Done

Sometimes
the last
paper

you read
makes you
cry.

Taking a Break

I am stressed out right now because grades are due on Monday and while I only have 3 more portfolios to grade, I still have all 19 final projects to grade. I know I'll get them done tomorrow, and probably very quickly, but I'm exhausted, I'm cranky, and I'm just generally depressed.

I really, really wanted to go home for a little while before the new semester started. I had planned on leaving on Tuesday to go home for a week. Then my sister informed me that she was coming for 3 days this Monday. Then directly after that is my "annniversary weekend" with Boyfriend. So that knocks out next week. The week after that I have 3 meetings with my new boss about the advising aspect of my job. I REALLY wanted to get out of them, but of course I couldn't. So that knocks out the week of the 13th-17th. And of course the fall semester starts on the 20th.

I'm just so desolate and exhausted and I really needed that time to recoup. When I'm home with my Mom, we laugh. We hang out. We just be. And I was really counting on that because I always need to recharge before the new semester starts, because teaching takes so much out of me. I constantly feel like I don't have any time to myself--I'm constantly on call to students. And it wears me out.

And I feel like I'll be starting the new semester already in an emotional deficit... and let's face it, this semester is going to be hard. I'm teaching Tech Writing, which I've never done before; I'm doing 12 hours of week advising, and another 8-10 working on the school's cable network. So I'll probably be on campus every day, which means I won't have downtime to grade and think... let alone write!

I'm so depressed. I guess I should just go to bed. I can do those last 3 portfolios tomorrow morning, along with all those final projects. It's obvious to me I'm about to break down and cry, I'm so tired.

I'm sorry for whining.

I Do This Every Semester (DAMN ME!!)

I am sitting on my bed, surrounded with about four bazillion student papers and wondering how the hell I'm going to get it all graded. Now granted, I've got a whole week before grades are due (I think--I best check that out!), but I'd rather get them done sooner rather than later (like I usually do)--which if I had done the grading for the annotated bibs ontime, then I wouldn't be having this problem. On the other hand, half the classes turned them in late, so that also put me behind--but that's no excuse. The truth is, I suck when it comes to grading. Plus, I still have to grade reading journals --which I mostly just spotcheck--and the webpages--which won't take long, but it's still ONE MORE THING--and then do all the GD adding of points and blah, blah, blah. Well, you know how it is. Maybe one day I will not procrastinate like I do. But let's face it... the habit is ingrained. And I never change... I mean, hell, speaking of procrastinating--I'm here writing this blog, aren't I? It's hopeless. Oy.

I guess what I really ought to do is when they turn in their work, I should just stay at the office till I get at least 2-3 hours of grading done. If I did that every class day, I'd be in a better place than finding myself at the end of the semester inundated with work. Part of the problem too is that the first part of the semester, the workload is light, and then in the last month of teaching, I get in 500 points worth of work to grade for each student. For instance, I picked up the annotated bibs on 4/13; their final reading journals on 4/18; and had final projects from 4/23 to 4/27. It's easy to get behind when you get so much work at the end. But the long and short of it is, is that I procrastinate like a maniac. Because I suck.

In my only defense, I have to say that I've had terrible migraines for the last two weeks, and the only thing I can do when that happens is crawl into my bed and sleep. Which is also not conducive for getting work done.

And finally, I'm PMSing bigtime... bleah.